let's hope they create a big bang and not another Footscray black hole.
A long way to the top Robert Murphy | September 18, 2008 http://www.realfooty.com.au/news/news/a-long-way-to-the-top/2008/09/17/1221330931481.html?page=fullpage#contentSwap1 DER-ne-ne-neh! I couldn't resist starting this week's column with the opening riff of our newly crowned national anthem, It's A Long Way To The Top, from AC/DC. Standing side-by-side with your teammates, looking directly into the faces of your opposition, is a unique and spine-tingling experience. On TV screens in the comfort of pubs and homes, the stony faces give the impression of a calm before the storm. But for me, and a few others I suspect, it is anything but. Having once been to Rome and marvelled at the Colosseum, I know after the past two weeks that if I visit the ruins of the Roman Empire again I will have a much greater appreciation. The MCG is undoubtedly our modern-day colosseum. Having said that, there are a few things that maybe don't come across on television, or even for the spectators at the ground. Such as a player inevitably asking himself whether he should mouth the words to the national anthem, or choose to look straight into the face of the enemy with unwavering nerve. In week one of the finals, I decided that as a former choirboy I should at least mime a few words. After we got pumped, I thought a change of tactic at anthem time would make all the difference. Such superstitious stupidity is rampant in professional sport, but I have now become a slave to anthem silence, which has taken its place sitting neatly alongside my other footy rituals — avoiding touching the banner and putting Vicks up my nose before a game. The curve ball on Friday night, however, was the introduction of the new anthem. Had we players been notified of the change, I might have made an exception and happily mimed my way through the whole number. In moments of true madness (and it was madness, wasn't it?), the little voice in your head can say the funniest things. Standing in line, I was absorbed in total and single-minded focus by the con-*test*-('") that lay ahead. Then, as soon as that riff thundered out around the ground, that little voice said (just to me, I presume), "At some point, that will be hilarious — but not right now." Some business needed to be attended to before the spoils of human error could be enjoyed. Jared Crouch, bless him, was caught by the cameras having a wry smile, and I'm glad I wasn't standing opposite him, as sometimes one little snigger is enough to set you right off. I ruined many a Sunday church visit for my dear ol' mum with a giggling fit that started with little more than my sister pretending to go cross-eyed. But back to the music. The song selection that turned out to be an error (with shades of grey) only lasted for about half a second. If you played the first half second of most songs, you probably wouldn't be able to identify them. The beauty of AC/DC and that song in particular is that, with its almost quintessential guitar riff, half a second was more than enough time for a new anthem to be unmasked, and another chapter added to the ever-growing book of football folklore. Without getting too religious, I do believe it was a gift from the spirit of rock'n'roll. Perhaps even Bon Scott himself (maybe Bon was a Bulldog supporter?). I think I could say with some certainty he would at the very least be a Bulldog sympathiser, the heavy guitars and straight-at-you lyrics soaked in the working class ethos that Footscray is drenched in. Regardless of where this gift came from, it gave me the inspiration for a column and played a significant part in a finals victory. I will forever be in the debt of rock'n'roll. And so we are now left with four. After clearing 24 fences, only two remain on the road to glory. We face off this week against the fancied Cats from Geelong, an assignment that is one of the toughest. But that's what it's all about. On our side is the spirit of Footscray, and it seems rock'n'roll as well. Those two allies, along with 22 players hell-bent on making their own history, will hopefully be enough. As our new anthem tells us, it's a long way to the top. But that's why the prize is such a valued one.
Once again, Cooney takes care of business Robert Murphy | September 25, 2008 http://www.realfooty.com.au/news/news/mad-cooney-monday/2008/09/24/1222217333540.html?page=fullpage#contentSwap1 AS THE Brownlow Medal got to the business end of voting on Monday night, the Bulldogs were getting to the business end of Mad Monday. It had been a day splintered by lots of laughs, as usual, and topics such as "What is your favourite flavour of potato chip?" were as intellectually challenging as it got. With each passing round we became increasingly aware that our boy Cooney was a real show, and also that some of the boys have quite passionate views on chips. By about round 19 we had taken control of the pub's television set, and with eyes glued began barracking hard for our mate. As the beer and chips continued to flow, there was a sense that something special was about to happen. Mad Mondays aren't renowned for moments that are truly special, but when it became apparent that Adam had won the Brownlow, there was total hysteria. We all embraced and cheered, drinks were spilled, and the chips that seemed so relevant earlier in the afternoon were cast aside in the search for taxis. One cab driver was so shocked as we ran out of the pub that I'm sure he thought we were looting the place. Our costumes did nothing to help our taxi-pursuing cause, having dressed for the day as who we wanted to be when we grew up. I came as a cowboy, for which I conveniently (and a little disturbingly) had all of the clothes. Shaun Higgins' Phoenix Suns outfit has already had publicity, but it was another basketballer, Scott West as Michael Jordan, who deserves special mention. As a child, Westy obviously wanted to be one of the grea-*test*-('") of all time. We are so grateful he grew up to do just that, with the Bulldogs rather than the Bulls. Anyway, we somehow all made our way to the city and, despite being under-dressed and over-hydrated, managed to get past security and congratulate the young Bulldog champion. As usual, Coons had a cheeky smile and moved among well-wishers with as much grace and presence as he has done on the football field all year. An exhilarating footballer to watch, Adam thoroughly deserves this la-*test*-('") accolade. I've been lucky enough to watch him from up close, and on more than a few occasions this year, when he picks up the ball and bursts clear from a pack with his legs going faster than his body, I have blurted out "Ooooohh" within earshot of my opponent. His ability is so unique that he can cause involuntary noises from teammates and opposition players alike while the game is still in progress. A different character off the field, his take on life and razor-sharp humour have made him an extremely popular teammate and a favourite of the west. Relaxed and unaffected by what the mainstream is doing, Adam has a low-key demeanour that can conceal what is really going on under the surface. You don't play as well as he does consistently without a strong work ethic and fierce desire to win. It's been reported that Adam virtually has to be poked in the arm down in the rooms as a reminder that the game is about to start, and maybe he should think about putting his boots on. He has made this pre-game persona his own, and it clearly works. At the beginning of this year I thought to myself, "What could I possibly say to Adam before we run out?" I didn't want to upset his rhythm by getting too in-his-face. As with most of life's difficult questions, I asked myself, "What would Elvis do?" Elvis and his Memphis mafia had a little motto and simply referred to it as TCB (Taking Care of Business). I told Adam this little yarn before round one and we laughed. We went on to win, of course, and since then that's all I bother to say to him before a game. He certainly TCB'ed on Monday night, right down to his speech and the tale of his proposal to Haylea. The boys have already declared we'll move on from chips to Burger Rings for next year's Mad Monday. With the grand final upon us, all eyes will be on the Hawks and Cats in what promises to be a classic. Having been beaten by both sides in the finals I can support the idea that the two best sides are playing off in the big one. As a spectator this week, I can't wait to see some of the best players do their thing. For the Cats I'll be taking keen interest in Joel Selwood, whose maturity as a player has captivated all in football. I will be equally keen to see Steve Johnson repeat last year's feat. My favourite player to watch in the game, "Stevie J" will be keen to show everyone just how good he is. For the Hawks I'll be keeping watch on Luke Hodge, just about the best kick in the world. The other Hawk to watch is a youngster named Lance Franklin — something tells me he is craving the spotlight a grand final will provide.